How do I find balance in the midst of a ‘tug o’ war’?
We all experience a familiar ‘tugging’ during our season of growth in our relationship with Jesus.
Have you ever participated in a tug o’ war competition where two separate teams of people align themselves in an orderly fashion on two opposite ends of a rope? This game is normally characterized by one rope and two separate teams of people who compete against each other to test their physical strengths and ability by pulling the rope to a certain distance and direction against the opposite team’s forceful pulling. Have you ever noticed that a ‘tug o’ war’ game session would usually end with one of those two opposing teams on the ground near the other team’s territory? This is because the pulling and tugging of one team against the other is so intense that it eventually results in one of those two teams succumbing to the pressure and pull of the opposing team.
We often experience a tug o’ war during our season of growth in our relationship with Jesus. We are like that rope being tugged to and fro with Jesus being on one side pulling us into His unconditional love, purpose and destiny for our lives and the enemy working through others on the opposite end of the rope pulling us away from God’s love and fullness of life in Christ. I don’t know about you but I sure would want Jesus to have full control of my rope. I Know He’ll ensure that the other end of my rope is connected to the right people!
The tug o’ war begins that very moment we decide that we want to go deeper in our walk with Christ and begin spending a lot more time than usual with Him. As Christ is drawing us closer to Him many are offended. Many times people may assume that “they’re losing you” or “You are simply neglecting your relationships with the people closest to you”. Little that they know, God is actually creating and molding a better you hence the necessity of spending so much time with Him. Experiencing this tug o’ war is normal. In fact, the deeper we go in Christ the more this tugging will intensify!
As Jesus is tugging on your heart and calling you higher into a closer walk with Him, you better prepare to encounter opposition; even sometimes from those closest to you. Something is taking place in the spirit realm as you are meeting with Jesus; beautiful eruptions are occurring as you meet with Him. Spiritually you’re sprouting and beginning to align with God’s purposes, blessings and destiny for your life. The enemy of your soul on the other end of the rope is attempting to work through others in order to pull you as further away from Jesus as possible. The Bible says in Ephesians 6:12 that our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. The enemy will attempt to raise his head through the spirit of offense in the people in our midst. They will begin to make you feel guilty for all of the personal time you spend with God. Don’t be at all surprised when this happens. You may even loose a few friends who you thought you would run with for a lifetime. Just know that as you submit to God and ask Him to direct your life, He will. Just trust in Him and always remember that He knows best. He will begin restructuring your life in order to get you to that place He needs you to be. Yes, you will lose some very close friends. Yes, your circle will become much smaller. This is because everyone isn’t going where God is taking you. God has a major purpose and plan for your life. He has called you to fulfill a major assignment. He has to properly align you first in His presence then with those friends and relationships He has in store for you. Just let it happen; you won’t regret it.
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:5-6)
Weariness from opposition
All of a sudden you would begin feeling weary and just tired physically because of the many demands that are suddenly being placed on you by those in your midst. This is all a part of the enemy’s plan to frustrate you and to distract you from the new thing God wants to do in your life or from the next steps God is directing you to take towards your destiny. If the enemy can get you frustrated and angry with others he can rob you of your peace and joy and bring division to your relationships of purpose with others and also most importantly to your relationship with Jesus. Sin separates us from God but through repentance and obedience to God’s word we can live in love and harmony with both God and those in our midst. Don’t get me wrong, we can never please everyone; especially when we’re living to please God alone! However, I can guarantee you that if you walk in accordance with God’s word and instructions He will make all things right for you; He will direct your path if you trust in Him to handle those things that are completely out of your control. Holy Spirit can bring balance to our lives if we just listen to Him and obey His still small voice. Balance is what we need! God will teach you how to maintain relationships with those loved ones He has purposely placed in your life.
Finding balance in life through Holy Spirit
Holy Spirit will work with you to bring order and balance to all areas of your life such as your relationship with God, relationships with others, your work, school, rest time, health and fitness, quiet time etc. He wants to invade ALL areas of your life in order to lead you to a life of increase, abundance and fruitfulness.
Do not become frustrated as you experience the tug o’ war. Instead, allow Jesus to pull you completely over into His arms of love and steadiness. He’ll properly align you and lead you to a life of balance. You can’t be defeated! Arise and shake off all weariness, frustration, slumber and tiredness! There’s a work for you to do beloved. Remain focused and steadfast in Christ and allow Him to bring a beautiful balance to your life. He knows best.
Let go of toxic relationships
There are some relationships we must let go of but there are also those God- ordained relationships/ friendships that are necessary for us to develop and maintain. God will enable you to distinguish between those relationships that are His will for your life and those that are just distractions. Of course I’m not referring to your family members, children or spouse when I speak of “letting go of some relationships”. If you feel you’ve already married outside of God’s will, I would advise you to just submit everything to God in prayer; you’re in safe hands. I meant those relationships that are ungodly or completely outside of God’s will for your life; specifically the ones that are outside of marital and family relationships. Whether it be a boyfriend, girlfriend, close friend best friend etc. These relationships are no good for you if they’re outside of God’s will for your life. They will often times lead you down a path of hurt, pain, unnecessary regrets and even destruction. These relationships outside of God’s purpose for our lives will take us off the course from His perfect will and best life for us. Always seek God for direction with your relationships. If you made the mistake of entertaining purposeless or ungodly relationships in the past don’t allow it to keep you away from God. Instead repent and shake off those regrets, learn from them and lean closer into God’s love and grace. He will work all things together for your good. Remember, not every good thing is a God thing. Holy Spirit will teach you through scriptures how to distinguish between a good thing and a God thing. This is a great topic to explore in a future post!
Walk in love
If we meditate on the word of God daily and listen to the still small voice of Holy Spirit we’ll hear Him saying “do just a little bit of this; a little bit of that; more of this; add a little bit more of that”. He completes us and brings much needed balance to our lives. We’ll also hear Him whispering to us constantly to “walk in love with others”. What do you do when your friends and others close to you frustrate you, accuse you or place numerous demands on you? Do you run angrily and selfishly to your small corner and throw a pity party? No, you just lean in a little more closer into Holy Spirit and you’ll hear Him whisper:
“Walk in love beloved and obey my instructions; I will lead you.”
- signed Holy Spirit
“Therefore be imitators of God as dear children. And walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling aroma.” (Ephesians 5:1-2)
“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.” (Hebrews 12:1-3)
“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” (Matthew 6:33-34)
“Do not let the sun set upon your anger, and do not give the devil a foothold. (Ephesians 4:27)
“"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." (John 16:33)
Blog Post Written by Andrika Moss